Random Super SmackDown Ramblings (Dec 18, 2012): Clay's Boo Boo Face

So, AJ has reasons for attacking John Cena at TLC. They are that he was just like Daniel Bryan and CM Punk in that he used her and never really cared. I get that with Bryan, but didn't Punk tell her straight that he cares enough not to do that to her and is worried about her mental health? Maybe I only remember good things about CM Punk and repress the negative. But Bryan? Yah, he was an ass to AJ.

Also, Big E. Langston is her protector and Dolph Ziggler is the one she does tongue stuff with now.

To be honest, AJ didn't need to explain. We all have reasons to beat up John Cena. He's the biggest kayfabe dick in the entire company. He deserves to get beaten up. He deserves to take multiple running hug walls from Langston. All the time he's being a dick, he deserves people to treat him like one. But I suppose right now, that dead horse is dust.

The good news is that AJ is back to being psycho AJ, which is definitely what she is best at. The other good news is that it seems WWE have finally thrown their hands up and said, “Okay, we need to put money on Ziggler. He's our horse now.” That is what people say when they're gambling on horses, right? This could turn out to be very, very good for both of them. And Langston, while he doesn't exactly look like the most exciting character around right now, is associated with two of WWE's most exuberant characters, so that should help.

Though, I really hope WWE aren't going to try and pass Langston off as a monster. He really doesn't fit that bill. Diesel was a monster. Batista was a monster. Langston isn't. He's not got the physique to be a monster guy. Violent and dangerous? Merciless and calculating? Absolutely. Monster? Ehh, not so much. Food for thought.

Other SmackDown Ramblings:
- CM Punk came out with a banana peel on his head to call the WWE Universe a bunch of cotton-headed ninny muggins' for not voting him Superstar of the Year. In fact, I think John Cena being the Superstar of 2012 when clearly Punk has had a superior year is a great case for teens and pre-teens NOT having smartphones. Remember how Punk has said in interviews that if he does pipebombs every week they stop being special? Now I see what he means. We haven't had a speech like this, with this sort of passion and fire, in a long time out of Punk. It wasn't on par with the original, or even the subsequent two months' worth, but it can still be classed as a pipebomb. And it was still fucking awesome.

Ryback came out to announce that some doctor has been disclosing Punk's medical information to him and that he'll be getting a WWE Title shot on the first Raw in January. Okay, some doctor needs to get FIRED. How did Ryback get hold of that? The only people who need to know that information are WWE Management. I don't know why, but I like Ryback less and less every time I see him. I know I said I was coming around to him, and maybe it's just because he's chasing Punk, but he's really getting on my nerves right now. The whole cheer leading thing is old, and I just feel like Ryback shouldn't be talking. As the silent killer, he's great. Not the most fluid wrestler, a bit clumsy at times, but it's fun watching dweebs get murdered. This Ryback just feels like what happens when a guy becomes a favourite of the machine.

- And then Ryback has to go and beat Antonio Cesaro clean. Really? No, I mean, REALLY? We talked about this yesterday, WWE. What's the gosh darn friggit point of this? Look, I don't care if Ryback's the first American to hand Cesaro his first loss as U.S. Champion. I'm not mad that Cesaro lost, I'm just mad that they didn't make a big deal out of it. Cole just said, “Who can stop Ryback?” and failed to acknowledge that Cesaro's shtick is now dead in the water.

- Kane, Kofi Kingston and Daniel Bryan beat Wade Barrett and the Prime Time Players. Fun six man tag match which is all that can really be said here. I did enjoy JBL putting Cole in his place about The Shield, though. That speech about anyone can step up and stop them was great, and using Kane as an example of a guy who doesn't whine, just gets in and fights was also great.

- Dear Josh Mathews.

If you ever think of, or get told to repeat, a line like “Wrath of the Titus” again, don't say it. Just don't. Awful line. AWFUL.

- Damien Sandow beat Sin Cara, and all is right with the world again. The Shield also beat up Rey Mysterio somewhere in the back and left him in a heap. You'd think that was just an expression, wouldn't you? But with Mysterio's body, he probably was literally a heap. I go back to what I said when The Shield first arrived; it'd be nice for them to attack the bad guys, too. If we could get some of that done, this would be excellent.

- Santino Marella beat Tensai because Tensai isn't even allowed to get a bit of heat before taking the loss. On Raw he just stormed off and on SmackDown he gets beat by Santino. The future may be bright, but it ain't Tensai, folks. Maybe it's the nipple piercings. Maybe WWE hates nipple piercings. Yes, that's it. Let's send this rumour to some site which loves to be on the cutting edge of wrestling journalism.

- Brodus Clay beat Brad Maddox and then got attacked by The Shield. You know the best bit about this match? Clay's boo boo face.